29th of July, 2009

something really bad happened to me last night...
I don’t really know if I can find words to describe the fear, or rather the awareness I felt that it’s the silliest possible, truly inappropriate, way of dying...
I got poisoned, and the situation got really serious. It turns out that the reason for my frequent stomach aches in Panama was probably some kind of a strong allergy to pineapples.
Last night, I ate something like a half of this tasty fruit, and I felt pain in my stomach immediately. The thing is, it was much, much stronger than it had used to be on the continent... When I decided to take some painkiller, it was too late – with a weird taste in my mouth, I felt totally dizzy, with hot and cold flashes... I staggered around the yacht for some time, then I lost consciousness. Luckily, it was just for a moment. I knew that I had never felt that sick before. I was scared, afraid that I would never see my loved ones again. I wanted to call someone just for a sec and give them the position of my yacht (I hadn’t sent e-mails for days, so nobody actually knew where I was), but the phone was too heavy, I just couldn’t hold it in my hand...
I thought that I’m on the wrong course, that if I keep going like that, nobody will be able to find Tanasza for a long time... or that it may be robbed in Columbia. I thought that there are still so many things that I want to do in my life... Yesterday, for the very first time I wanted someone so badly to be with me, to give me some antidote...

After the first shock, when it seemed that the worst moment was gone, I regained consciousness and some power. Yet, I was afraid that it would come back in a moment, so I called home. I’m sorry that I worried you. Mum, and Cousin Ania, thank you so much for your help. Although I was too weak to reach my first aid kit and find some medicine, it was really important for me to have someone to talk to (by the way, I didn’t know earlier that there is a recipe for a ‘homemade’ drip infusion: a glass of water, a spoonful of sugar and a teaspoonful of salt. Now I know, and you know it, too:) Perhaps it’s not particularly tasty, but in case of an emergency it can save you from the effects of dehydration). I could call them via the Iridium satellite phone, which I have on board of Tanasza thanks to Krzysztof Kamiński. I am very grateful to Krzysztof for that. Thank you.
Today, I’m still really weak, but I’ve been trying to get some sleep, to rest a bit, although there were many ships on the horizon, and I felt very cold...
You know, I think that the only thing that saved me was the fact that at the very last moment I drank water, telling myself that it was my last resort, the only chance to somehow wash these toxins out. Maybe it was this, maybe something else... anyway, I’m still here.
What else can I say? I fed fish with the other half of my pineapple ;) And one more thing – it is really important to tell the ones you love that you love them, and to spend your time with your family and friends, because any day could be the last one.